


Even Guardians Get Scared

by LittleLadyBigDreamer



Series: Evlynn Baby Collection [1]
Category: The Librarians (TV 2014)
Genre: F/M, I hope, Kinda Fluffy, Longest two minutes of their lives, Relationship Development, Touchy-Feely, kinda angsty
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-22
Updated: 2016-01-22
Packaged: 2018-05-15 10:15:12
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,873
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5782240
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LittleLadyBigDreamer/pseuds/LittleLadyBigDreamer
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Eve gets scared. Flynn remembers what's important. They talk (for once).</p>
            </blockquote>





	Even Guardians Get Scared

**Author's Note:**

> So this started with a single line and ended up being super long and I'm sorry if you fall asleep. I'm not sure I'm completely happy with it so let me know what you think or what you think they'd say/feel. Happy Reading :)
> 
>  
> 
> (P.s. I'm not sure about everywhere else but in England we tend to refer to head lice as nits. FYI. Sorry. I couldn't resist.)

Cassandra, Jacob, Ezekiel and Jenkins all looked up at the same time as the back door flashed and a very angry looking Colonel Baird stomped into the Annex heading straight for the stairs, not looking any of them in the eye as she marched upstairs. "Do NOT let him follow me!" she exclaimed before any of them had a chance to speak. They heard her footsteps fade away as she seemingly approached the room she and Flynn used for when they needed to stay in the Library, before the sound of a door slamming confirmed she had reached it. The four looked at one another before snapping their heads back to the glowing back door as a stumbling Librarian came hurtling through it, bag swaying across his body, hair and clothes dishevelled.

"She here?" he panted, waving his hand about to convey he meant the Annex, having finally noticed his audience. A nod and point upwards from the wide eyed redhead encouraged him to ascend the winding staircase. As he did the four below finally raised their voices.

"Uh Mr Carsen, sir" the grey haired caretaker began.

"She said she didn't want-"

Cassandra trailed off and a half wincing Jake added "I wouldn't man."

He was followed by a smirking Ezekiel who looked like he was enjoying this all too much. "What'd you do?" he asked, eyebrows raised, the biggest grin swept across his face. 

Flynn's face was painted with fear, confusion, panic and more fear. "I uh...I think that I erm...well...I don't know" he rambled, letting out a sigh at the end. "How...how mad did she look?" he asked, not really wanting to know the answer, hand rubbing the back of his neck as his stomach convulsed with nervousness and dread. The looks on their faces told him all he needed to know and he sheepishly dragged his feet the rest of the way up the stairs. 

Inside the room Eve was still stomping about trying to remember where she'd left her handbag a couple of days earlier, pacing and muttering as she searched. She finally found it sandwiched between two pillows on the bed and pulled out a smaller bag from within it. She had been so engrossed in her search she hadn't noticed the Librarian hovering near the door. "Eve?" His voice pierced through her and she jumped up and spun around to face him, discreetly holding the package behind her back. 

"I told them to tell you to leave me alone" she stated through gritted teeth, avoiding his gaze.

"Well I couldn't do that" he replied simply. "Eve. I- I don't exactly know what it is that I've done but I'm sorry." She frowned at him, half confused, half angry. How exactly did he think this was making things better? He edged closer to her and if she hadn't already been pretty much backed against the wall she would've stepped farther away from him. "All I know is that I've hurt you and I never want to do that, not intentionally."

One phrase stood out to her in that and she suddenly voiced the anger that she'd been withholding for the last fifteen minutes. "That's just it Flynn! _You know_. You think you know everything about everything!"

His usual smugness returned for a second then as he grinned and retorted "Erm well...Librarian. Kinda do."

She growled internally, scowling at him before exclaiming "well then why don't you realise how much I love you and that it is terrifying for me to see you in danger?!" She had raised her voice a fair bit more than she had intended and her arms were no longer hidden, now wafting about in front of her as her emotions dictated her movement. Flynn just blinked at her, clearly not expecting her to say anything like she just had. She said she loved him. But she was angry. He was very confused. He attempted to gather his thoughts and respond but she cut him off apparently continuing her rant. "First you almost died in my arms because you were trying to save Cassandra, then you try and follow Prospero and Moriarty to god knows where and then today! You practically offered yourself up without a second thought! You didn't even let me try and do my job. I'm your Guardian Flynn, I'm supposed to be the one that saves _you_. But it's not even about that! We're not just a team we're a family, we need you, the others need you and hell even Jenkins needs you! You can't just keep throwing yourself into danger like that, like you don't matter!" She took a deep breath, a sigh of relief at having finally said out loud what always scared her. Eve's head was buzzing and she could feel a headache coming on. She lowered her head and brought her hand up to it, massaging her temples. A prickly sensation came up to her eyes and she cursed silently. No. No no no don't cry. 

Flynn stared at her, trying to process everything she had said. She looked so...fragile. His heart sunk as it dawned on him how much she was hurting, how much she was hurting because of him. He didn't mean to get into situations like that, he just did. It was a reflex more than anything. He needed to solve the puzzle, save the world, so that's what he did and he had to admit that with all his brains he tended to neglect the safety aspect of it all. He tried to think of how important her work was to her, how many people she'd lost in her line of work over the years. She was the most caring person he knew anyway but the fact that that's what her job involved...she was right, it must be terrifying for her to not have any control over the situation, to see one of her charges in danger with no clue of how to protect him. _But it's not even about that_. He wasn't just one of her charges though. It was different. Even if they agreed to let the job be more important, it would always be different. He brought himself back to the room and continued to look at her, really look at her. This precision-oriented, strategic, incredible woman who had accepted him and all the crazy his life entailed, who had somehow managed to understand him from the first week they met and had become his world. Now she was standing here looking so fearful and broken and he didn't know how to fix it. He wasn't used to this, he'd never had this kind of relationship with someone, something so deep and meaningful and...real, he'd never really had the chance. He desperately racked his brains over how to proceed until it occurred to him. _"The things that make life living can't be thought in here, the must be felt here."_

Flynn slowly walked over to Eve's sniffling figure and brought his hand to her cheek cupping it, despite her initial protests and embarrassment at her tears. Upon her reluctance to look him in the eye he raised the other hand to her remaining cheek and tilted her head, tenderly stilling her, ensuring her focus was on him. "Hey" he whispered. He stroked her cheeks as her sparkling azure eyes finally met his. "You're right. I shouldn't have done that. I am so sorry I scared you. I...I just do these things sometimes. I'm not used to people needing me or protecting me anymore. I forget. I see the job and all I think about is how to...do that. It's all I've known for so long it's become a habit I guess. But it was stupid and reckless and I am sorry."

"Good. You should be. It _was_ stupid" she muttered between snuffles, a frown forming at her brows. 

He laughed faintly at her assertion. "But you know how much I love you too and I think part of me was just trying to protect you, not as my Guardian but..." He took a deep breath before continuing with confidence "...as the love of my life." Her eyes widened and she just blinked at him, then he saw tears begin to develop. Oh god. Why was she crying again? He panicked silently for a moment before remembering how he felt and allowing it to guide him. "You are. I have never felt about anyone the way I do about you. I lived to work but you came along and showed me what real life is about. I know you still think I'm crazy about work and yeah I kinda am but the times that we spend together; travelling across the world, movie nights with all the others, our night time walks, just holding you and waking up next to you, that is the stuff I live for now. You are what I'm crazy about."

Eve's heart was running wild as she imagined her Librarian's head usually did. How did he do this?! She was supposed to be mad at him and here she was melting like a fangirl. She was apparently still crying but pushed through her tears to whisper "me too. You're the- you're mine too." She couldn't bring herself to say the words, either because it sounded somewhat cheesy in her mind or because there was a Colonel back there still dictating her speech. "Flynn, you changed my life once and god I'll always be grateful to you for that but please don't change it again, not like that." With that her tears began to fall again but she was immediately comforted as she felt Flynn's lips press softly against her eyelids, wiping away the tears, then sweep across her face before ending with a firm but affectionate kiss that was clearly trying to voice _"I'm here"_. 

Flynn pulled away and lowered his hands in an attempt to clutch on to hers. He managed the right but as he reached for the left she yanked it away and for the first time he realised it was occupied. "What's that?" he asked motioning with his head to the package that she was now tightly gripping and uselessly still trying to hide. 

"Oh...uh...nothing, it's not anything" she mumbled, heat rising up her neck as panic began to consume her. It was now Flynn's turn to furrow his eyebrows, in confusion. Why did she look like that? She was...she was lying to him. He knew her, she rarely ever lied to him but when she did he knew, like that time she promised they weren't attending a meeting with the others at 7am on a Sunday when he'd finally gotten her to himself after a crazy week and for once just wanted to spend the day cuddling her. 

Dammit. He knows. He definitely knows. Why couldn't she lie to him? Her career depended on her being able to lie to people, or at least not tell the truth, which was one of the reasons she found it difficult to maintain relationships, why could she not do it now? Because this was Flynn. She couldn't lie to him. He always found a way to annoy her or pout until she gave in. She had been trained her whole adult life to not crumble in those situations but she had not been trained for Flynn Carsen. 

"Eve what is it?" he asked again, this time concern showing on his face. 

"Honestly nothing...just a...thing" she waved her hand about trying to be as casual as possible. 

Still lying. She attempted to move past him but he clung on to the one hand he was still clutching and pulled her back, returning the other one to her cheek forcing her to look him in the eyes once more. "Eve" he stated again, this time more firmly. "Tell me." 

Oh god look at him. His little face. He was trying so hard. Eve scrunched up her face and let out a deep breath before finally uttering "I um...I'm...late." She diverted her eyes from his as soon as the words left her mouth, unable to watch his reaction.

"For...for what?" came the confused response she was definitely not expecting. Good god. If she'd not been so panicked about the whole thing she might have laughed at his reply. Her Librarian. Brilliant, but oblivious as ever.

"No Flynn. I'm late" she repeated, raising her eyebrows and gesturing with her head to emphasise how exactly she meant the word. She took another deep breath before finally bringing the package she had so desperately tried to keep hidden into view and held it out for him. He took it from her quivering hands and pulled out the box inside: _KCS Home Pregnancy Test_. 

Flynn's eyes widened and he gulped as the words swam around on the box in front of him, before gazing back up at a wincing Eve. They had been so careful. Really careful. Even when she'd mentioned something about not being able to sort out where to get her pill since being hoisted to Portland. Well then they'd been extra careful. Hadn't they? "You're...you're..." he pointed to the box clearly unable to say the words. 

"I don't know" Eve admitted, still wincing. She watched Flynn's eyes widen even further until she thought they might actually fall out. 

"Wha- uh...how- how late are you?" he finally managed to splutter.

"'Bout a week" she replied, now biting her bottom lip. "I- I got it a couple days ago but with all the chaos going on around here I never got a chance to take the test. Besides...it didn't feel right. I couldn't take it without you there."

Oh. 

"Not that I expect anything...from you...or anything" she quickly added, not even fully understanding what she meant herself. "I mean, I don't- uh...I don't even know what _I_ want..." she trailed off. What the hell was she saying right now?! Get a hold of yourself Eve. She needed to find out what was happening, formulate a plan and extract it. Right. Except this wasn't a military operation. This was her and Flynn. And potentially...something else. Oh god. 

Flynn's mind was in a haze and his body felt like it was constantly being jolted. He had a hundred reasons to panic and run far away right now but the look on Eve's face made him act otherwise. He hooked his finger under her chin, pulling her towards him and kissed her deeply, her lips now slightly chapped from her nervous gnawing. Once they'd parted, still close enough that their breaths mingled together, he found his voice once more. "Take the test." He wasn't entirely sure how he was planning to proceed or why he wasn't babbling and pacing with fear but he thought it might have just a little something to do with the fact that the strong, confident blonde in front of him was currently frozen in sheer panic, looking more vulnerable than he'd ever seen her. This was Eve, his Eve and from the first time he had kissed her he had silently promised to try and make every day of her life as perfect as he could.

"I'm scared" she whispered.

"I know. Me too. Whatever happens we do this together okay?" She nodded and he pulled on her hand once more and walked them towards the bathroom murmuring "come on". They reached the bathroom and Flynn stepped to the side holding the door open for her to walk in. "I'm right here okay?"

She nodded again, remaining silent. She closed the door and Flynn hovered outside finally pacing and letting out multiple deep breaths as he did. This was not a position he thought he'd be in. Not just with Eve, he knew he loved her and wanted to spend the rest of his life with her but he'd never thought about it...much. They'd certainly never talked about it. He could hear her cluttering around inside, still not saying a word until what did not seem like only two minutes later when she uttered "uh Flynn?"

"Yeah" he replied almost instantly. "Is it done already?" he asked, bouncing even closer to the door?

"No...erm...could you...maybe not...hover?" she finally managed to say, knowing that's exactly what he would be doing.

Oh. Right. She was already nervous, him hovering so close to the door was probably not helping. "Yeah...sorry."

A few minutes later she joined him back in the other room, gazing everywhere but at the stick in her hand. She grabbed a tissue from the box on the coffee table and laid it down, setting the test on top of it. "Two minutes" she stated simply and Flynn grabbed his phone from his pocket and immediately set a timer. She settled down next to him on the couch and he cautiously placed his arm around her waist, pulling her closer to him ever so slightly. His touch seemed to relax her and she let out a sigh before leaning into him, head resting against his shoulder, eyes closed, only feeling his warm body, the brush of the carnation sitting on his lapel; only smelling his calming scent, books, rock from the cave they'd been in and just Flynn. After a moments silence she spoke again. "Flynn. What are we gonna do?"

"I don't know" he answered truthfully.

She laughed a little then and pulled her head back to finally look at him. "Oh _now_ you don't know?" she asked sarcastically. He laughed and held her a littler tighter. The smile fell from her face, overtaken by concern once more as she asked "how the hell are we gonna do this? How could we even let it happen?"

"Because we love each other and this is all a natural progression of our relationship? Yeah we didn't exactly plan it but sometimes these things just happen." 

Why was he being so calm about this?! Natural progression?! They hadn't even talked about babies...or getting married or...anything. "Flynn this is a baby. An actual real person. We can't bring a baby into our lives! Into...all of this! We fought a manticore inside a three thousand year old cave today! A year ago we were trying to stop fictional characters from taking over the world and almost got stuck in the 17th century. The day we first met I was hunting terrorists and you were retrieving an opal that summons demons while helping me prevent a bomb from going off! How do we bring a child into that?!" 

Flynn stared at her trying to process everything she had just said. Eve sighed and took his hand. "Look, it's not that I don't want to...have a baby...with you. I do someday...maybe. I dunno. But right now it's just not practical." She hated sounding so clinical about it but it was the truth. "It's difficult and scary enough for me trying to protect all of you as it is. I know Jake can hold his own and you're experienced with looking after yourself but sometimes I feel like I'm herding sheep and you're all going off in different ways and I don't know how to protect you all. Add a tiny, defenseless person into that and I'm not sure I could cope. I'm always wary of Jones being the reason I'm dragged out of bed at 3am to go to a Moroccan jail or something, and Cassandra...well you know." Flynn nodded in agreement at that part. 

"I don't think we'll ever stop worrying about her"

"I know we graduated them and they're getting used to doing things their own way, and that's great, it really is. But...they're still new to all of this. They need us and they're adults, babies are so much more. It's just always so chaotic around here. It petrifies me when I think I'm gonna lose anyone of them, especially you but if we had a baby and they were in danger...I can't even imagine."

"Hmmm" Flynn voiced thoughtfully. "You said we" he added, somewhat randomly Eve thought.

"Huh?" she asked, confused.

"When you were mad at me before. You said the others needed me but first you said 'we'. At the time I just thought you meant all of you, yourself included but you were talking about...this weren't you?" Oh. Eve nodded again and Flynn suddenly realised just how horrified she must have been when he'd thrown himself in front of her to protect her from the manticore. She might not have just lost him, she might have lost the father of her child. 

A second later a small smile graced his face and he asked "can you imagine what the others would be like if we had a baby?"

"Stone would be good. He's used to kids, got a lot of family" Eve supposed, shuffling in her seat before leaning back against Flynn .

"He'd have them obsessed with Native American art before they started kindergarten", Flynn mused.

"Oh god. Jones would make an Artful Dodger out of them by the time they were 6!", Eve grimaced.

"Cassandra would be never be away from our place from the second they were born" speculated Flynn, highly amused by the prospect of a very excited Cassandra. 

"Uh uh" Eve replied shaking her head. "She hates babies."

Flynn snapped his head round to the now calm figure positioned comfortably against him. "What? Cassandra? Really? How'd you know?"

"She was very very drunk one time. Tells the truth a lot."

"Huh. I would not have expected that" he replied tapping his fingers at his jaw.

Eve laughed at his reaction. "Giving you all the surprises today aren't I Librarian?" He raised his eyebrows in an affirmative response, a smile tugging at his lips.

"Jenkins?" he inquired. She looked up at him as he looked down to meet her gaze.

"Mad" they said in unison before giggling like schoolchildren.

 

Their laughter was cut off by the sound of Flynn's phone beeping. Flynn felt Eve's body tense as he reached to silence the timer. He looked down at her, still resting against him, more or less burrowed into his shoulder now, searching for safety and comfort. He clutched her hand lacing their fingers and looked her in the eyes, his other hand finding her cheek and cupping it once more. "Together" he stated, repeating his earlier sentiment. She nodded and held on tighter to his hand. Flynn leaned forward bringing Eve with him and they both took a deep breath before looking down to the white stick on the table.

A little blue minus sign indicated that they no longer needed to wonder about the reactions of the others. "It- It's negative?" Flynn asked, realising he hadn't actually checked what sign meant what. Eve merely nodded again unable to believe the sign in front of her. 

"Well...I guess that's that."

"Guess so" Eve finally voiced. Her stomach felt weird. She didn't know why, she was relieved. Wasn't she? They sat in silence once again, hands still locked together, Flynn's thumb stroking the back of Eve's hand. "Flynn. I pretty much just talked about what I was thinking this whole time. What about you? How'd you feel?"

"Well that's okay, you had a little more time to panic about it than I did. Plus, it's... it _would_ have been your body going through all of this" he replied, tucking her hair behind her ear. Eve simply smiled at him, raising their hands to kiss his. God, he really was incredible. "But I think you're right about it all. Practically it would not have been easy. Our lives revolve around danger and crazy, it's not always safe environment for us let alone a child. We never know where...or when we are from one day to the next. You saw what I did today when I thought you were in danger, who knows what I'd do to protect you and our baby." The final two words rang in Eve's ear and she felt her stomach flip in a way she hadn't expected. She had to admit...it sounded right. "I think I would enjoy fatherhood though. I told you about my dad right?" Eve nodded and he continued. "So besides Judson I never really had-...it'd be nice to be that person for someone else, do things that I never really got the chance to do with my dad."

"I think you'd be a great dad" Eve stated, smiling at the thought. He beamed at her in response and pressed a kiss to her forehead before leaning back against the couch, disconnecting their hands in order to pull her in close and allowing her to settle against his chest.

Eve rested an arm across his abdomen and he began tracing his finger along it before mumbling into her hair "you'd be an amazing mom." He felt her huff slightly in amusement and continued. "I mean it. I'm not just saying it because you did...said that I'd be a good dad, not that I be a good mom because you didn't- I mean...anyway. I really mean it. You're incredible. You're caring and strong and kind, and look how you are with the rest of them. I think we'd definitely be good parents."

"Please do not tell me you're referring to the others as our children"

"Well...they kinda are...like that...a little bit"

"Flynn"

"Sorry. But we are a family"

"I'll give you that"

"I know it took me a while to adjust but...I like it. I like having a family with you Eve."

She craned her neck to look up at him. "I like having a family with you too Flynn" He smiled back at her and tilted his head forward slightly to give her a peck on the lips. 

"So we're agreed? Us, Jenkins and the LITs, all one small crazy family?"

Eve laughed at his now animated voice. "Yeah. Although they're not in training. They haven't been LITs for a while now"

"Oh yeah. The LITs-not LITs! No, too long. Fully trained LITs! No wait, that's not right. Aha! Not in training: the NITS!"

Eve burst out laughing and covered her face with her hands. "You cannot call them that!"

"What? Why not?...Oh. Oh I see. Nevermind" Eve shook her head as she finally stopped laughing. How did he do it? About a half hour before she had been mad and annoyed and close to tears, worrying about their future and now here she was laughing like there'd never been any problems. But that was her Librarian. That was how they worked. She had been so scared before but they'd worked through it and had come to understand each other more. He was right, as long as they faced things together they'd be fine. 

Flynn was still muttering to himself when she pulled herself out of her thoughts. "Got it! The Librarians Not In Training!"

Eve raised an eyebrow. "The L-NITS?"

"Uh...no...the 'n' is silent" he decided.

"So...LITs?"

"No. LNITs. Silent 'n'"

Eve laughed and rolled her eyes before shifting slightly to completely wrap her arms around his waist. "I love you" she said softly.

"Love you too" he replied pressing a quick kiss to her head. "Wanna go steal some of the pizza that Ezekiel has most probably ordered and spend a quiet night with our family?"

"I'd love to" she answered and they moved to leave, Eve picking up the test and walking over to the bin. She stole one more glance at it before disposing of it and walking over to the door where Flynn was waiting for her. 

"Hey" he wrapped his arm around her and looked her straight in the eyes. "If it happens it happens. And if it does I'm not scared because it's me and you and I know that whatever is thrown at us we'll be okay. Okay?"

Eve wrapped her arms around his neck and leaned into him, capturing his lips between hers, kissing him deeply, feeling his soft lips warm against hers, his stubble grazing over her chin as he returned the kiss. Her fingers tangled in his hair and she pulled him closer as she felt his arm tighten around her waist. When they finally parted she felt his warm breath drift over her skin, lingering with a hint of the several cups of coffee she'd unsuccessfully persuaded him not to have that morning. " 'kay" she whispered, their noses bumping, foreheads pressed together, her cheeks flushed, his eyes flickering as he slowly composed himself. 

Flynn's thumb brushed Eve's waist and with his other hand he held the door open for her. "Let's go" he said as he motioned to the door. She exited the room grabbing the hand that had formally been on her waist as she heard Flynn mutter "LNITs with a silent 'n'. It's this kinda thing that got me the job of Librarian." Eve simply chuckled to herself and shook her head. Dork.

**Author's Note:**

> You made it! Sorry it got long. As always everything and anything is appreciated and I hope you liked it :) x


End file.
